So, is it just me, or is it incredibly awkward when you sit down with someone for an initial interview, and the first thing they say is: "So, tell me a little about yourself." Tell you about myself? What do you want to know? I'm a cancer, I love chocolate, I'm a shopaholic? To me, a first interview is a lot like a first date. There's so much ground to cover, but you don't wanna give away the farm right from the start. You have to sound unique and fun, but not too much of a party-girl. You have to sound cultured and well-read, but not a total bore that no one wants to hang out with. They have to believe that you are equal parts funny, witty, charismatic, intelligent, diligent, organized and hard-working. So you simply keep some things to yourself. Hey, it's not lying. It's simply putting your best foot forward. So, maybe don't mention the fact that you have successfully eaten a quart of Ben & Jerry's Rocky Road in your bed by yourself while watching a marathon of Grey's Anatomy. Perhaps omit that you go to the gym solely to get one of those awesome berry shakes, pretend to ride a stationary bike, and stare at the guys lifting weights. Don't discuss the piles of clothes and shoes littering your bedroom at the moment, causing you to act like a climber trying to get to the top of Mount Everest every time you leave your room. And, last but not least, you should probably not let it known that you only shave the part of your calf that your pants will be showing off that day.
Instead of sharing all of those totally-you-but-completely-embarassing details, talk about your schooling, where you live, how you're family-oriented. Talk about your pets and how much you love to drive around with sunroof open, listening to blasting music. Talk about how much you love to read (so what if you haven't read an actual book in over three years, they don't know this). Talk about your love of fashion, and nature, and traveling and other beautiful things.
I assume in a first interview a person can go one of two ways -- you either tell the best, most promising things about yourself, or you do what I did, and make a fool out of yourself. I had a "meeting" with a magazine writer yesterday in a smelly bar in the village. I had prepared for this meeting (not interview, meeting) by reading some of his articles, doing a background check on him to see what he liked, what he wrote about, etc. I was totally prepared to woo him with my knowledge of researching, fact-checking, and proofreading. And yet, when I sat down in the huge wooden booth, I was completely unprepared for the seven little words that came out of his mouth -- "So, tell me a little about yourself." I believe my exact words were something along the lines of "Umm, well, let's see, umm." Smooth, I know. Then I graduated to much more mature sentences like, "Well, I'm twenty-three years old...I'll be twenty-four in the summer." Really, Jen, really?! Did you actually just say that you'll be twenty-four?! What are you in elementary school?! "I'm seven and three-quarters!" Humiliation. Thank God I'm so pretty. I was able to do that smile, eye-catching thing that I've had down-pat for the passed ten years, and saved my pitiful self.
Then I moved on to talk about how I'm a teacher, but I'm trying to get away from that field and move toward the world of magazines and writing. And then, another curve ball. He asked, "Why?" "Why do I not want to be a teacher?" I asked back. "Yeah, why the change of heart?" I could have answered honestly and said something along the lines of "Little children are the bane of my existence," but I decided to go with a more loving and generic, "I feel more like a babysitter than a teacher and writing is what I am really passionate about, so..." After a few more questions about how old my students are and how long I've been teaching, he, thankfully, moved on.
That's when he asked if I had ever written anything before and I began talking about the book I wrote about my studies abroad in Italy. (Damn, could have mentioned that I love to travel.) He asked if I'd gotten it published yet and I said that I was trying, which I am. Then, strangely enough, he started asking me how I was trying. How am I trying? "I sent out like 200 query letters, got 4 maybe's, and about a million No's." He seemed to accept that. Who is this guy? Asking me questions about myself and my book? I was so confused. But then when I told my mom the story, she said it's common for an interviewer to ask you to talk about yourself and to give a reason for wanting to leave your current job. Who knew? The irony is all I do is talk about myself anyway, and yet there I was, speechless.
When we finally started discussing the job at hand, I sounded worst than ever. It turned out that he needs someone will a lot more free time than I have. But I tried to stay strong. When he said there would be red carpet interviews, I tried to contain my salivating. "Have you ever interviewed anyone before?" he asked. "No, but I think I'd be great at conducting interviews," I said, eyes shining. "Why do you say that?" he asked. "I dunno, people just like talking to me," I fired back, smile big, eyes slightly crinkled. He laughed, I smiled brighter. Got him.
So, for anyone who hasn't gone on an interview in awhile or has never been on one at all -- take note. Have awesome, witty and intelligent things to say about yourself and your work. Don't be cocky, but sound incredibly confident about crap you've never done in your whole life and have no clue how to do. Dress really pretty and get your hair blown out. Whiten your teeth so they glow a little. Wear the good makeup and put on heels. And don't forget to shake hands, keep eye contact, and smile. Everyone loves a happy, confident, smiling person. The smile will get them every time ;) Except, of course, for the times it doesn't. But try anyway!
Jennifer
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